return my video game
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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