Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
