Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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