Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Randomize
