No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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