There was a lot of him and a little penis
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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