I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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