so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
