Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
