So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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