I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Naked Twister starts at high noon
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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