think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Randomize
