Who wears a wallet chain?!
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
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