its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
