It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Randomize
