You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
