Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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