So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
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