: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
