its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
