fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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