Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
