Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
