I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Quick, to the slutcave!
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize