I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
He is an equal opportunity slut.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
My vagina just clenched in fear
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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