Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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