She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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