they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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