Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize