I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
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