just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
