I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
