Do you still have your period?
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
