I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
