I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
