Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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