Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
