Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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