i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
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