I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
