They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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