i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Randomize
