So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
