You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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