ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
