I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
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