is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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