can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
