i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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