Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
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