And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
